One day a telegram arrived at a man’s door. When he opened it, he learned that his best friend had passed away…
I was at conference recently where I heard this most inspiring story.
The story was about a boy and a girl who grew up together as best friends. As they grew into adulthood, they became pre-occupied with their personal lives. Although, they knew that they lived just down the street from each other, they were too busy to seek out one another.
Every week they wanted to visit each other but thought to themselves, “Oh well, I am too busy today. We live close enough to each other to visit anytime. I will try tomorrow.” It was not long before tomorrow turned into next week and then next month. Eventually a year had passed by.
Soon the distance between their homes began to appear more distant. The longer they waited to look for each other, the further the distance between their homes grew. This was followed by more excuses that did nothing but increase the gap between the two friends.
One day the male received a telegram informing him that his best friend passed away. As if he had gone into a shock, he asked himself, “What happened?”
He thought to himself, “If I knew I was going lose her without seeing her again, I would have taken the time to look for her. I wished I taken the time to tell her how much I loved her. Now she’s gone, and I am now all alone.”
Regardless what this individual thought or felt, his best friend had left the earth for good.
Do soulmates exist? And, are soulmates pre-ordained?
There is a biblical verse that goes something like this. “Before I formed thee I knew thee and ordain thee to be…” What the verse tells us is that before you were born, your creator knew you. He knew your need for a mate and ordained you and another person to be soulmates.
The problem is too many people do not invest themselves 100% in recognizing their soulmate. They hold out, settling for unhealthy relationships until it is far too late.
Before a mother brings a child into this world the mother will know the child’s need. She will ready a room with all the things the soon to be newborn will need. Likewise the supreme power that put you here on earth knew you would need a soulmate. One has been prepared just for you.
You can say “I will find my soulmate tomorrow. I am too busy today.”
But, if you do, take time to remember the story at the beginning of this article. It was procrastination that prevented the two friends from finding each other until death separated them forever. Your soulmate is not going to be waiting for you forever!
I know how it feels to be in relationship other than that of soulmates. You have probably been hurt or disappointed so often, you don’t trust anymore. I know all about the pain associated with break-ups. All of the pain, frustration and loneliness you may feel can be avoided if only you will not turn to excuses and justifications, but instead make the effort to look for your soulmate.
Yes, soulmates do exist. Adam and Eve were the first soulmates recorded in human history. When Adam was created, his creator said, it is not good for man to be alone. Thus a helpmate was
created for Adam.
What is a helpmate, and why would a person need a helpmate if the person were able to make it alone?
This leads me to believe that in order for a man or woman to feel complete, they will need each other as helpmates. Adam and Eve were created for each other. I am using the word ‘for’ to show that soulmates belong to each other and nobody else.
For instance, when Eve ate the forbidden fruit that could have separated them, they sought out each other and did what ever it took so they could be together. An effort to remain together is clearly demonstrated between the two.
Are you too busy to find your soulmate? Do you allow fear of effort or failure to discourage you? I do understand how you feel. I have clients who feel the same as you do. I have also gone through the same experiences you have.
Here is what I tell my clients. When treasure hunters hear of buried treasures, they don’t make excuses. They don’t let fear of the possibility of being bitten by a poisonous snake or their ship sinking prevent them from going after the treasure. They find the exact map that will lead them to the treasure site. When they get there, they dive or dig for the treasure. When they find the treasure, they do their part to ensure that any piece of gold bar they find is real gold.
It will be nice if our soulmates can fall on our laps without any effort on our part. Unfortunately, life does not work like that does it?
How does it feel to go from one lousy relationship to the other, because you don’t want to invest the time or effort to find your own soulmate?
I know how it feels to think you are madly in love. Then, a year or two later you find that it was all a big mistake.
So where do you turn for help. Where do you get that map to help you find your soulmate? When you do meet the person, how can you be certain it is the right person?
First, forgive and forget about the past and start fresh from today.
Human beings are created with the need to be with the opposite sex. Not just any opposite sex, but a specific man or woman whom they will feel complete with. Soulmates are pre-ordained.
Meeting a man or woman is relatively easy. Recognizing the person who is intended to be your soulmate is another thing. In the book “How to Identify your Soulmate”, I reveal important
knowledge you must have to help you to recognize your soulmate.
Like a treasure hunting map, the e-book provides an effective soulmate map that any one can use. The ebook will help you to learn how to get a confirmation that someone is your ordained
mate. Every effort is made to constantly include special updates in the ebook as they become available.
You can also learn how to handle the effect of break-ups. I have dedicated an entire ebook on my site to help people succeed.
Soulmate relationships have incredible soothing powers; they are heart warming and possess healing qualities.
The process of recognizing your mate is very real. You may be the only person keeping you from finding your special someone. Live today as if it is your last day. You willnever know how successful you will be unless you try. My hope is that you don’t allow procrastination, ego, pride, excuses and fear to prevent you from finding a rewarding relationship with your pre-ordained soulmate.
Ernest Quansah is an author and expert relationship advisor, specializing in helping singles recognize their soulmates and couples improve their relationships to achieve emotional and physical fulfillment. He is the author of online ebook “HOW TO IDENTIFY YOUR SOULMATE” Website: http://www.soulmateinfoserve.com. Visit his Website for free relationship advice. SPECIAL OFFER: Buy his ebook and get 1 year free support plus other critical updates in his exclusive online members forum. Copyright © 2003 All rights reserved.
What Is A Soul Mate?
Is it a buzz word being tossed around by New Agers and Romance publishers in order to increase book sales and seminar fees? Is soulmate just another term for true love or is it something else, something more, something bigger and deeper?
Good question. If you browse the Web, searching under the term “soulmate,” you’ll find testimonials of How I Found My Soulmate on the Web, and pointers to Personals Ads for you to search for a personal soulmate, but you won’t find much hard information on soulmates or much discussion on what a soulmate is.
Three types frequently discussed are the soulmate as an essence twin or counterpart–one’s other half, the companion or lover who helps one achieve a goal, and the karmic teacher who comes into your life to teach you an important lesson. I know that there have been times when we’ve been convinced that, “This is the one. This person is my One True Love, my Soulmate.”
However, often in these cases, for one reason or another, the relationship hasn’t worked out. Were we mistaken? Was that person not our soulmate? Or, was the person our soulmate, and, for one reason or another, we just weren’t able to make things work?
I believe that each of us has one or more persons who can help us to growth and become all that we can be, who will support, honor, shelter, guide, serve, succor, challenge, adore, and love unreservedly. I also think that most of us manage in some way to miss out on these relationships. Therefore, we are always searching for the ideal relationship, the ideal partner, the soulmate, if you will.
Love is love, and love is never to be taken for granted or belittled. To me, the question is not, “Is this person my soulmate?” but “Is there real love here?” not “Who is my soulmate?” but “Do I give and receive love generously and unselfishly?” not ” When will I meet my soulmate?” but “Am I ready to be in an intensely loving relationship, ready to be challenged for growth?”
The most common type of soulmate is the compassionate soulmate. These people are just extremely comfortable with each other. Their love is deep and strong, but it is not necessarily sexual or romantic, although the sex and romance can be extremely rewarding if that is the nature of the relationship. Frequently I use the term “soul brother” or “soul sister” to identify non-romantic compassionate soulmates. This kind of soulmate can be two life long friends, for instance. We all know people whose primary relationship is not with their spouse but with a friend or other family member. Sometimes, they can even be admiring adversaries.
Another kind of commonly accepted soulmate is the task or goal soulmate. These people have a goal or task to accomplish, and their relationship is centered around the task. This soulmate relationship can be romantic and sexual, but it doesn’t necessarily have to be. Any time that two people have a burning commitment that drives them together so that they work better together than alone, so that they seem to work as ne, so that they function almost seamlessly together, there is probably a goal or task soulmate relationship present. Sometimes one person is the more dominant, is the more public, is the mouthpiece or understood leader, but the relationship is stronger and more important than the individual, at least as regards the goal or task. A lot of musical collaborators probably serve as good examples of this type of soulmate relationship. Often politicians and their spouses are also examples of this sort of soulmate. In other words, this kind of soulmate can be romantic or non-romantic as well.
The third type of soulmate is the type most often depicted in literature and popular culture. It is the twin flame soulmate. With this type of soulmate relationship, there is no moderation. Everything is passionate. Everything is connected. The two people often feel as if they are two halves of one whole. When they finally meet and come together, there is a feeling of “At last! I’m finally complete!” Again, the relationship can be either romantic or non-romantic. In some ways, this is the most difficult of the three types of soulmates to maintain because the two persons have trouble with boundary issues, with knowing where one person begins and the other person ends. When one partner dies, the remaining partner feels literally torn apart and may have trouble functioning. Often the remaining partner will die shortly after the first one does.
A lot of us feel “If we are truly soulmates, it will work out.” This is not necessarily so. Did Romeo and Juliet “work out? Did Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor “work out”? I suppose that we could say that on some level, those relationships did work, but most of us would prefer to have a soulmate relationship with a happier ending than those examples.
Why don’t soulmate relationships work out? For the same reasons that other relationships don’t work out. Finding a soulmate is no guarantee that you will live happily ever after with your One True Love. Finding a soulmate is wonderful, but it still requires the careful nurturing that all loving relationships require, and it can still suffer the stresses of every day life and sometimes even not be able to survive those stresses.
Nina Lee Braden
Recognizing Soulmates and Being Recognized by Soulmates
by Nina Lee Braden
One of my most frequently asked questions is can the Tarot or astrology tell me absolutely if this person is my soulmate? The answer is No. There is no way to know absolutely in Tarot or astrology if two people are twin souls or soulmates. There are many hints, many suggestions, many clues, from a variety of sources, but no simple and sure way to know.
First, let me give my personal definition of soulmate. In my way of thinking, a soulmate relationship is one where there is mutual unconditional love. I believe that we all have several soulmates, some romantic and some non-romantic. Most of us have been blessed to have known and given unconditional mutual love, but it is not always in a romantic relationship.
I believe that there are people who are our soulmates who, for one reason or another, we never develop the soulmate relationship with. They are our soulmates, but the connection just doesn’t go through for one reason or another. For example, you may be a soulmate with a famous person, but unless you meet and develop a relationship with that celebrity, it will not be a soulmate relationship. Most people are really more concerned with a soulmate relationship connection than just the existence of an unfulfilled or unrecognized soulmate, and rightly so. We may never meet many of our soulmates or develop a real relationship with them. These soulmate relationships are like buds which never open.
Sometimes, however, what we think/feel are soulmate relationships are not but are karmic connections. This is often the case with famous people who may be paying back karma and do so by inspiring others, often complete strangers. Their lives touch us and inspire us, but they never know how their lives have blessed us. We know, but they don’t. A famous person can be very important to you, but this does not necessarily make this person your soulmate.
Remember, if the other person doesn’t feel the connection as well, then it isn’t a soulmate relationship. It may be karmic and important, highly significant to you, but there are many one-sided karmic relationships unlike soulmate relationships which are two-way.
Being soulmates has nothing to do with physical attractiveness. You can be the most gorgeous person in the world, but you can still not attract someone. Ever read an interview with an attractive model, musician or movie star? How many of them talk about how difficult it is to find someone? Far more than makes logical sense. So, physical beauty is not the issue here. Many people who are not at all attractive by conventional standards have an exciting and fulfilling love life.
We are all irresistibly gorgeous to our soulmates. Remember Linda McCartney? Most people did not think that she was very pretty, but Paul McCartney sure did. In their married life, they were only apart 11 nights–pretty amazing. If ever there were soulmates, Paul and Linda McCartney were soulmates. She was irresistibly gorgeous to him. He could have had any woman in the world, but he chose her. McCartney has a new girlfriend now. Are they soulmates? It’s likely. I would say that having had one wonderful soulmate relationship that McCartney would be unlikely to settle for anything less.
So, if we are irresistibly gorgeous to our soulmates, what’s the glitch? Well, it could be one of a couple of things. First, we have to show our love not our fear. Is fear attractive? No. When we are living in fear, we are not attractive, not even to our soulmates. Second, we have to put our gorgeousness on display.
For example, I love teaching Tarot. When I teach it, I glow. I radiate. I am gorgeous, for all that I am not normally gorgeous. My husband met me at one of my Tarot classes while I was in my “glow mode.” Would he have fallen in love with me if he had met me elsewhere, doing something where I wasn’t glowing? I don’t know. Maybe, maybe not.t when they are on the basketball court, they are beautiful. They are hot, they are sweaty, and they are beautiful.
One important truth which I want to stress: the universe wants each of us to find at least one of our soulmates for a great hook-up. The universe is on our side in this endeavor, this desire that we have. When we are having troubles in the soulmate connection, what’s the hold up? Either something in our lives or something in the life of our nearest and most likely soulmate, or both.
One bit of common advice given to people searching for soulmates is, “Work on yourself.” I remember hearing this when I was single–I hated hearing it! I assume that the rest of you hate to hear it as well. However, it is important. More important than you realize, for a variety of reasons.
Anything that you do to improve yourself ripples out and touches those around you in a positive way. When you are happy, that happiness radiates out and resonates with others. It’s like sympathetic vibration. Have you ever been in a music store when someone strikes a tuning fork? What happens? All of the stringed instruments in the store start to vibrate, to resonate with the tuning fork. When you work on yourself, you are striking a tuning fork which resonates and affects all of your soulmates. The good that you do for yourself is also good that you do for them. The very best thing that you can do for all of your soulmates (known and unknown) is to work on yourself for this gives them positive energy that helps them with their own struggles.
Another thing to remember when waiting for a soulmate, which version of you is someone more likely to be attracted to, the you who loves herself/himself or the you who is angry and afraid? The you who is vibrant and glowing and radiant or the you who is tired and energyless and depressed? The more you are in the self love mode, the more likely your soulmate is to find you.
So, engage in something you love, something that makes you radiate, something that shows off your true beauty–and do it in public, so that your soulmate can find see you, remembering always that the good that you do for yourself resonates with your soulmates.
However, remember that not even soulmate relationships exist happily ever after without a great deal of work and effort. Good luck, best wishes, and happy hunting.